You dont have to be.

I am tired of being alright.

My Doctor tells me I need to get myself a sponsor.  My father tells me something similar.  Although he takes a different tact, not that I have a problem but more that I should speak to someone.  I have to ask though, why?  One of my personality flaws is the constant desire to please other people.  If I take a step back I ask myself, have I manifested this issue just because other people are telling me I have a problem?  People are are always telling me what to do, what to think and how to behave?  Obviously I know drinking alone is unhealthy, but when did this habit come about?  Oh yes, when I was told that I should stop drinking.  Why was I told to stop drinking?  Not because I drank more or less than my friends, but because other people _assumed_ I had a problem because of my history.  So yes, I do have a problem.  And now it manifests in the form of alcohol abuse.  Is the problem drink?  Perhaps, but thats just the side-effect of a greater problem.  I spend every day of my life trying to keep other people happy.  Even in my career, all I do is work hard, beat myself when I _perceive_ some flaw and try to impress.  Im a doormat, and this is beginning to eat me up.  I am unhealthy and addicted to alcohol because people tell me I am, because people tell me every day I Have A Problem.

Yes, I have a problem.  I dont live my own life.